Dear God,
I know we don't talk much, what with you being a total asshole (judging by the company you keep) and me not believing in you. Despite all that I wanted to say thank you.
Thank you for ignoring the prayers of all those fair weather Oregonian sports fans and handing the victory to whatever squad they were up against in whatever athletic event they were competing in. Now not only do I not have to listen to play-by-play reminiscing all night at work tomorrow, I can use this as further evidence that you don't exist.
Sincerely,
Happy Dude
PS: This in no way means you are off the hook for that tropical paradise you stole from a former incarnation of myself. That was a total dick move and you know it!
2 comments:
Dear God,
You fucking asshole! They talked about it anyway. You knew that would happen. You knew I would have to listen to a bunch of people who have never actually played the sport prattle on about what those who do actually play it all the fucking time should have done.
Go to he... oh.
Dear Jake,
You are in a tropical paradise now. Wait until you see what I have in store for you next!
God
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