Monday, March 30, 2009

I'm not cool, but I'm also not afraid of penis

I liked Watchmen. A lot, even. I guess I'm not cool enough to hate it.

It wasn't perfect, and the original comic is better. ...but, duh, if you didn't know that then you obviously have never seen a movie before.

What really amazes me is how much people focus on the penis - all the negative reviews I've read have had to throw in a jibe about the shiny blue cock.

I'm just not particularly threatened by it, but I get the impression that for some folks the big blue wang ruined the film. What's the big deal? It's just a penis - I see one every day... well, not a blue one, and mine's only that size when environmental conditions are really favorable, but I'm also not a 50-feet tall superhero who's harnessed the power of the atom.

Considering his powers, folks should just shut up and be thankful he wasn't tying balloon animals with it.


Reminds me of a song we used to sing back in art school:
Oh, it's big
and it's wide
and it's six by nine
and that's just when it's flaccid

Oh, it's big
and it's wide
and it flows with the tide
but that's just when it's flaccid

Oh, it's round
and it's green
and it glows with a sheen
and that's just when it's flaccid
Some people would get mighty uncomfortable when we'd sing that, too, and I can't say I ever fully understood why.

2 comments:

Unknown said...

I fear penis. It is penis that rules the world and caused the bear market that has collapsed my 401k.

But I do want to go see Watchmen. I told my wife not to read the graphic novel beforehand just like I chose not to read Harry Potter books before seeing the film equivalent. It makes the movies better and the books better. (The books turn into an extended bonus feature edition.)

Brad said...

I loved the movie! I honestly thought it was the best movies I had seen in a while. I also NEVER expect a movie to ever be anything like a book, TV show or comic. I never understood why anyone ever thinks a retelling of a story will be the same as a previous telling of the tale. Why do people find this offensive? Has there ever been a movie that matched a book, can it?

As a side note I saw a preview for the new Land of the Lost Movie. It looks good to me. Nothing like any previous incarnations but a good telling of similar thread. Yes you can hate me for this. For that matter the new Star Trek looks nothing like anything previous and that looks good as well.