TALLAHASSEE, Florida (CNN) -- Softball, drunken orgies and a prison system run like the mafia. That's what Florida's former prison secretary says he inherited
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Corruption had gone to an extreme," McDonough said, saying it all began at the top. "They seemed to be drunk half the time and had orgies the other half, when they weren't taking money and beating each other up...
Interesting that they stayed sober for the orgies. I'd have thought beer-goggles would help, especially for workplace orgies.
If anything "tainted the system", it was definitely the softball.
McDonough described a bizarre prison culture among those that ran the system -- one that he says seemed obsessed with inter-department softball games and the orgies after games.
"I cannot explain how big an obsession softball had become," he said. "People were promoted on the spot after a softball game at the drunken party to high positions in the department because they were able to hit a softball out of the park a couple times."
"The connection between the softball and the parties and the corruption and the beatings was greatly intertwined."
Just another example of the sinful depravity caused by organized athletics.
I'm telling ya, those ancient prophets got it right way back in the desert when they wrote (in Leviticus): "It is an abomination before the eyes of the Lord for a man to touch the skin of a dead pig." Being prophets, they'd foreseen Monday Night Football, and knew just what a damning influence the worship of sports could have on society.
I realize I've given the anarchists on this blog a bit of a hassle from time to time, which I'd now like to retract. I'd just like to say, if Anarchy includes the elimination of organized sports, I'll sign up in an pudgy under-exercised heartbeat. To prove my commitment, I'll start practicing my protest chants and slogans. How about: "Down with softball! Down with football! Go down on balls!"?
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