(No) Sex In Space!

I was going to complain about how NASA was a bunch of prudes...

No sex please, we’re astronauts: NASA commander

TOKYO — There is no room for romance on board the cosy confines of the International Space Station, a NASA space shuttle commander said Monday when asked what would happen if astronauts had sex in space.

"We are a group of professionals," said Space Shuttle Discovery commander Alan Poindexter during a visit to Tokyo, after a reporter asked about the consequences if astronauts boldly went where probably no others have been.

"We treat each other with respect and we have a great working relationship. Personal relationships are not ... an issue," said a serious-faced Poindexter. "We don't have them and we won't."

...anyhow, I was going to complain about NASA's quaint morals, and how it might be holding back science. Going to, that is, until I noticed this guy's name is actually Poindexter. It's no surprise he's not getting any sex in space. I expect most Poindexters don't get any sex on Earth, either. So, maybe it's not NASA policy, just this commander guy saying his fellow astronauts wouldn't give him the time of day. We can only hope.

My advice to NASA: In the name of science, there ought to be sex in space. Eventually, as a species we must leave this rock and voyage out to the stars. That voyage will take decades, and no nookie for decades is a far worse obstacle to overcome than delta v, oxygen storage, and radiation shielding combined. If our race is to survive in the long run, NASA needs to get busy gettin' busy.

I realize resources are limited on the International Space Station, and there's never enough time or money for all the experiments they want to conduct. What they aren't realizing is that this is the opportunity to make the space program actually turn a profit. You send up about four really good looking astronauts on the next mission. You install some mood lighting, beam up a little Barry White from ground control, maybe slip some aphrodisiacs in their freeze-dried icecream, and start the cameras rolling. It'd be the next internet sensation, at least. Even if it doesn't sell enough DVDs to pay for the next launch, you'd at least get the voting public interested in space exploration again.