OJ - The Juice

What makes you so special, Orange Juice? What makes everyone just call you buy your initials? We're not on an informal nickname basis with any other fruits or juices.

• No one has ever said "top off my AJ" when they wanted me to pour up some more Apple.
• If I requested my waitress give me a BJ, I'd be slapped and kicked out of the restaurant before I'd get Blueberry Juice.
• If I told you I was still wearing nothing but my PJs as I typed this, you hopefully wouldn't spend time wondering if I'd dipped my naked body in Peach, Pear, Papaya or Pomegranate.

Yet for some reason, OJ gets all that buddy-buddy treatment and a football/movie/crime star named after it. I don't think it's fair. If I weren't a vegetarian, I'd juice an Orangutan in protest.