K-Mart has a new summer line of
abstinence pants. These brightly colored sweat pants have rainbows and bubble letters that tell people how you feel about intimacy before marriage. I was a teen boy once. It is true, I wouldn't have gone within ten feet of a girl wearing sweat pants let alone sweatpants with such horrible graphics on them. These things will really work! Buy them for your daughter and if she gets pregnant K-Mart will pay for the abortion! Of course they won't actually pay for the abortion. But if your daughter gets laid while wearing these consider it a miracle worthy of Christ himself. And I'm probably the only person who would support the abortion of a potential savior.
Upon seeing these I couldn't help but create my own product line of girls summer wear. I was just going to use the phrase here in a sarcastic manner. But DAMNIT! This is aught-eight and we can get ourselves some instant consumer product gratification. Let true love wait. Introducing the
Cheap Thrills Begin Now! panties.
K-Mart has a new summer line of abstinence pants. These brightly colored sweat pants have rainbows and bubble letters that tell people how you feel about intimacy before marriage. I was a teen boy once. It is true, I wouldn't have gone within ten feet of a girl wearing sweat pants let alone sweatpants with such horrible graphics on them. These things will really work! Buy them for your daughter and if she gets pregnant K-Mart will pay for the abortion! Of course they won't actually pay for the abortion. But if your daughter gets laid while wearing these consider it a miracle worthy of Christ himself. And I'm probably the only person who would support the abortion of a potential savior.
Upon seeing these I couldn't help but create my own product line of girls summer wear. I was just going to use the phrase here in a sarcastic manner. But DAMNIT! This is aught-eight and we can get ourselves some instant consumer product gratification. Let true love wait. Introducing the Cheap Thrills Begin Now! panties.
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