Briantony

When I first worked for United Artists Theatre Circuit, there was this guy named Brian who worked there as an usher. Brian probably had some sort of neurological, mental or developmental disadvantage, but I was never privy to a genuine diagnosis. He talked in a funny voice, his lower lip constantly quivered, and he sometimes failed to exhibit common sense. But he was really friendly and warm, and he had a great work ethic. He was a little odd, but I liked him. A few months after he started working there, he invited me to his birthday party. I was one of two people who showed up, and the other guy wasn't named Tony.

That was an eye-opener, because Brian constantly talked about his friend Tony. Probably every 5th sentence began with "My friend Tony". For a long time, I'd assumed Tony was his best buddy, always giving Brian things, always sharing opinions and advice with him. Clearly, Tony was a strong influence on Brian. When I expressed my shock that Tony wasn't at the party, Brian told a ridiculous and obvious lie to explain it away. I don't remember the exact reason, but it was downright Goldbergian, and Brian had panic in his eyes as he meandered improvisationally through the explanation. That's when I figured out Tony didn't exist, and decided I really wanted to leave the party.

Later inquiry and investigation confirmed for me that Brian had made him up, and I actually saw Brian purchase something in a store and then 10 minutes later claim Tony gave it to him. Tony was at best an imaginary friend, at worst a full blown delusional disorder. I, perhaps foolishly, shared this revelation with others, and poor Brian became known as Briantony or Brian-Tony from then on. Not content to merely take his ramblings with an industrial-sized grain of salt, various coworkers (and, I'm afraid, me too) chose to ask leading questions and provoke Brian into making ever more inane claims about Tony. Brian loved the attention, and I'm not sure if he knew he was being laughed at behind his back. If there was a hell, I'd be going to it for that. We were playing with fire.

Brian was delusional, that much eventually became undeniable. Prior to figuring that out, though, the whole staff of the theatre believed and accepted that Tony existed, as we'd had no evidence nor reason to doubt it. I'd just like to point out that our believing Tony was real did not mean we (my coworkers and I) were delusional. We never saw Tony, we never heard Tony, we never shared in his delusions. Yet we took Brian's word at face value until given good reason to do otherwise.